so i started this blog as a means of sharing some of my thoughts about this work that i am doing with my friends and other interested parties. basically, here's the deal: i am a lifelong compulsive and binge eater. food has always been my source of comfort and my way of dealing with whatever comes up in my life. i've also been fat my entire life, or at least as long as i remember. i was a big jock growing up - played soccer, softball, basketball, tennis, you name it. as i got older and more conscious of my body, i got further and further away from playing (it was also harder to play competitively as i was bigger and slower than most folks). for the last eight years or more, i've not played any competitive sports on a regular basis. there's also been a whole bunch of gender and queer stuff that's come into the mix that i'm sure i will get into later, but not now.

i'm going to be working through stuff on here that has to do with:

- coming to terms with my desire to lose weight and how that jives or doesn't jive with my anti-fatphobia and body politics;
- the actual things i am doing to help my body function better (changing what i am eating, exercise, etc.)
- how being queer and trans has informed my thinking about my own body and how that comes into play as i try to change it;
- other general minutiae and thoughts.

more to come soon.